Coach’s Note –
We are 1 –
3 since my last note. On paper that
sounds horrible. In reality, I am happy
with our progress. Our 1 win of course
came in a great game at Williamston. It
was a very exciting night for our program and probably the biggest win we have
had this year. Of the other 3 games, we
had a terrible night against Fowlerville but competed and did some good things
against Waverly and Jackson. The boys are developing a group confidence that is
going to help them in the tournament.
Now that we are in the “meat” of the season and playing 2 games a
week, I would like to address an issue that I play many roles in; the issues of
helping your son appreciate the amount of playing time they are getting or
trying to increase the amount of minutes they get on the court.
I am very aware that we all want our kids to play and it
sometimes seems irrational or unfair that our child does not get into a game. I have and am, part of that right now. My son played for me and started as a
sophomore at Olivet, transferred to LCHS and had to sit out a semester and then
did not get much playing time his junior season. Even in his senior year on a team that I was
an assistant coach, Connor had 2 games during which he did not even get into
the game. Now he is playing at Dominican
University in Chicago where he has started in a game and not played a minute in
another. He has been in games to hit
game winning shots and also, has played in games and not taken a shot. So please believe me that I understand and
have empathy for any of you parents who would like to see your son play more. The intention of this coach’s
note is to help you enjoy the season more.
With that said I would like to thank all of you for your
continued support of the program and appreciating the program for the opportunity
it provides for our children. I see a
lot of very positive interactions between parents and sons. Nothing has
happened and nobody has acted in a way that provided the catalyst for this
note. I do know that at this time of the season, playing time has shifted and
it’s really common to have questions and concerns about kids’
playing opportunities.
The following
suggestions are meant to help all of us enjoy the games and season while also
supporting the players. A big part of
educational athletics is developing a young person’s ability to
handle adversity, build emotional and physical strength, learn about positive
communication techniques and create a foundation of discipline that will serve
the athlete in the “real world.”
Coaches and parents are often overwhelmed by so many Little
Pictures that they miss the Big Picture entirely. How our children perform in a sporting event
is a Little Picture. Whether they win or
lose, play well or badly, laugh or whine after the game – all Little
Pictures.
What children take away from sports to help them become
successful, contributing members of society is the Big Picture. Whether they remain physically active
throughout life, learn to bounce back from difficulties with renewed
determination, discover how to support other people within a team context –
these are the Big Picture. - (adapted from the Positive Coaching Alliance organization)
With that in mind, here are some concepts and ideas that I
have tried (with varying success ;-)) to implement with my own children and
things I have suggested to other families.
- Instead of going to the coach to request more playing time for your child, consider any frustration they have around playing time as a teachable moment. Explain what motivates a coach and encourage your son to focus on what parts of the game they can control and how they might earn more playing time.
- If your child complains about playing time, talk to them about what they can do at practice to get their minutes to go up during game situations. This might involve working harder or spending time outside of practice to work on a skill.
- Encourage them to have an honest conversation with the coach. Help them learn the style of conversation that will be helpful in this situation.
- From my perspective it is important for all of our players and children to earn their playing time and parents to understand that they can help their child by focusing on the skills necessary to earn the time as opposed to talking to the coach on the player’s behalf.
- Some advice for parents and players of athletes that get to play a lot of minutes. Be the biggest cheerleader of your teammates that get limited time! Be aware that many players would love the game opportunities that you or your son gets. Recognize that this is a zero-sum game; when one athlete plays; another must be taken out of the game.
If we support, search for and seek positive moments to cheer
for each other, we will have created a positive environment where each athlete
has the opportunity to develop to their potential.
Please note! This is
not a correspondence to tell parents that they shouldn’t or can’t
talk to me or other coaches about your son.
We all want what is best for this team and will gladly discuss any
topics with you.
Upcoming: We play @ Eaton Rapids this Friday at 6pm.
Thanks for your time!
God Bless…
Coach Dartt
@coach_dartt